Thursday, March 21, 2013

BEHOLD! My New and Improved OKCupid Profile

Mongo likes candy.
So, I have mentioned many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many times how much I hate dating, especially online dating. And one time I jokingly created a post with what I call my "real profile" that shows me at my worst and my most sarcastic. The other day I was walking home in a rainstorm. My hair looked like birds were nesting in it. And I thought to myself, "I really wish I could put up a profile pic of myself right now, with my hair like this. I'm so sick of trying to take flattering pictures. This, right now? This is real."

And it occurred to me that I can do whatever I want.

Whatever.

I.

Want.

So, I gave myself a unibrow and took some pictures. And then I did some more pictures.

The result is the most fun I've ever had on the Internet. These are my OKCupid pics. Try not to date me too hard. I'm delicate.

They call it a unibrow because there is only one.
Like, oh my god. It's the 80s and I'm so surprised.


Are you there, God? It's me, Margaret's friend Bethany
who doesn't really believe in you.
I call this one "Caught in a Rainstorm Right Before
This Picture was Taken" because I was
caught in a rainstorm right before this picture was taken.
Not right now, doll. I'm watching Murder, She Wrote.
And the all important "body shot" so dudes know
I'm the whole package.

















































































Come on over and visit if you'd like to see my whole profile. And stay posted because there are more to come.

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