Monday, September 22, 2008

Today I Have a Heart of Darkness














Sometimes I go through a blue period. I can't write. I can't think. I just sit around and let the little black rain clouds develop over my head. When this happens, I like to close myself off from people. I'm surly and irritable. I'm overly sensitive about things. I just want to sit and watch TV and eat jelly beans with a bag over my head.

And so I like to counter it by being extra dramatic about how I feel. If someone disagrees with me, I say things like, "Fine. We'll see how you like it when I go read Sylvia Plath in my bathtub with an electric pencil sharpener," or "I'm going to go take this entire bottle of calcium supplements." Sometimes I walk down to the East River with my pockets full of heavy things, like encyclopedias.

Or I watch videos like this one.



I'm going to go eat some canned goods that might be past their expiration dates. FAREWELL, cruel world!

23 comments:

Amy said...

Me too.

Though I like to eat pumpkin shaped peanut butter cups with a blanket draped over my entire body.

yoda said...

So apropos! For moods & days like these I also recommend: American Splendor, sparkling wine, period literary dramas & 6 ft. under reruns. No I'm not talking about this past weekend. At all. Please pass the bottle of multi-vitamins. I'm going to crush them up & snort them under the stairs. With the worms.

yoda said...

Why am i yoda?! wtf?! doesn't matter anyway. Nobody knows me. Guess I really am going to eat some worms. Or some cheese. Shit.

The Honorable Mayor of Bethville said...

@amy: Oh, dude. I always lay under my blanket to have a temper tantrum. It's awesome.

@yoda: Go eat some worms you will.

nadarine said...

teenage suicide! don't do it!

Apropos in your twenties as well, obvs.

The Honorable Mayor of Bethville said...

nadarine: You don't understand me! Nobody does! I'm going to go write a poem about it.

peach said...

i totally agree about the period pieces. i was in a funk recently and got over it by watching zeffirelli's romeo and juliet. today's version of tragedy is a show where a mother drives by a van her kidnapped child is being held in. sucks.

The Honorable Mayor of Bethville said...

@peach: Maybe I need to have one of those 5-hour Pride and Prejudice marathons.

TheGuvnah said...

Might I recommend the BBC's Bleak House! amazing! dark! mysterious! disease! lost love! murder! alcoholics!

it's got it all.

The Honorable Mayor of Bethville said...

@theguv: The one with Gillian Anderson or the one with Diana Rigg? Apparently they've done it twice.

msdirector said...

@Mme Mayor - I love those P&P marathons. Room with a View is also excellent for those moods, as it just makes you more miserable because you wish you were in Italy.

And I haven't seen either Bleak House, but the new Northanger Abbey is pretty wonderful.

sigourneyfever said...

Ugh, I know this feeling too well. And usually I make it worse by listening to depressing music.

I have posted this before, but I can't NOT laugh when I watch this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B0UdP5oEn68

I highly recommend it.

The Honorable Mayor of Bethville said...

@msdirector: Also extremely helpful: reading Lemony Snicket books. They are like an annoying person who makes faces at you until you laugh.

sigourney: I have to admit, that made me laugh pretty hard.

jody! said...

when i am in a bad mood, i put on my scariest face, roll my eyes, eat sour patch kids until my tongue bleeds, and write letters ranting and raving to the mayor. she always responds in kind.

The Honorable Mayor of Bethville said...

@jody!: Speaking of sour things, did you find me any jelly beans???????? DID YOU????

Don't tell everybody or they will all want a mayoral penpal. :)

t.c. said...

I have a better YouTube video for blue days.

The Honorable Mayor of Bethville said...

@t.c.: That was a good one. But it's no...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xpcUxwpOQ_A

t.c. said...

I saw that one, but though I'm very impressed with the impersonations, they're not original muppets. Plus Danny Boy simply made me laugh more.

fitforafemme said...

I would have less temper tantrums if they weren't so much fun. I like to thrash around for about 60 seconds for extra effect.

The Honorable Mayor of Bethville said...

fitforafemme: Sometimes it feels really good to just let it all out.

Stefanie said...

Good for people to know.

Marissa said...

People should read this.

The Honorable Mayor of Bethville said...

@marissa: I think so too. :)